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THE HISTORY OF SWAGGALAGGIN

In the beggining, a nigh fool known simply as Dildenheimer introduced two class 5 homosexuals known as Phil and Lyle to each other. As is known by most, only 6 class 5 homosexuals can exist in the known universe at the same time. The bringing together of any two always results in some great tragedy(see 9/11 and "Lopez Tonight"). The ensuing two-way orgy lasted 10 days and nights, many may wonder how two men had an orgy, as the generally accepted number of participants required to constitute an orgy is generally thought to be 5. So great was their lust for cock that any and all men and women who gazed upon this act, would have sworn there were at least ten men involved. When the dust had settled and the lube pipes had run dry, the two men ceased their act and began to contemplate what their new partnership could bring to the world. It was then that Dildenheimer(who had been crushed under a building during the level 10 earthquake, which had come about as a result of the furious pounding of anuses that was previously described) emerged from beneath the rubble. "Hark buttburglars, I have a solution to your problem" he said unto them whilst eating a moldy crumpet he had taken from the hand of a dead orphan. "Together we shall create a podcast, it will be known as swaggalaggin, and you will sit in front of cameras for an hour at a time and spew your opinions and staunch homosexuality at the swaggots in the audience. Filling their heads with stories of pissing in trash cans and holding up Amish villages. This will make them feel at ease with their status as swaggots, and their numbers will grow, soon the audience will number in the hundreds of millions." Lyle's cum-stained lips stretched to form what could only be called a smile by the most thickly shit stained autistic. Phil's titties became covered with goosebumps in anticipation of the many fan orgies that awaited him. "Good, then we are in agreement" said dildenheimer, as he sipped tea from a cup that had been hidden in an unknown orifice. Thus began the beggining of the end for the world, soon the other 4 class 5's will be brought unto Phil and Lyle, the uniting of the six will bring about the end of the world, as was foretold by Pope Benedict the 3rd in the year 1895. No one knows what the end will be like, psychics claiming to have seen it have claimed it is only blackness. Scientists have theorized this blackness was created by the number of non-swaggots being so far in the minority that it triggered a convergence event. Every swaggot joining together to become one giant, enless anus, which became so large it engulfed the universe and all swaggots and non-swaggots alike that dwelt within it.

-Save the world, stop swaggalaggin before it stops mankind.

By, TheShinyRevolver